Show notes:
Ever wondered how to become a wedding singer? Today I am chatting with one of my members – Rebecca Cole. Rebecca has an amazing background in the entertainment industry and has spent the last decade working as a wedding singer. We chat about navigating a career change, a young family and keeping up with the industry changes.
Find Rebecca on TikTok, Facebook or Instagram
Find out about the Wedding Pro Members Lounge
Time Stamps:
00:10 – Introduction to Wedding Business Strategies
06:18 – Transitioning to Wedding Singing
08:44 – Starting a Career in Wedding Singing
20:51 – Navigating Work and Family Life
31:56 – Navigating the Wedding Industry: Community Over Competition
34:26 – Navigating the Challenges of Wedding Business
Transcript:
Rebecca Cole
00:00:00.320 – 00:00:09.060
There.
And yeah, again, it’s just if you know people that get married, that’s a great way to start because you can give your services for free only at the very beginning though.
Becca Pountney
00:00:10.080 – 00:00:55.412
I’m Becca Pountney, wedding business Marketing expert, speaker and blogger, and you’re listening to the Wedding Pros who Are Ready to Grow podcast. I’m here to share with you actionable tips, strategies and real life examples to help you take your wedding business to the next level.
If you are an ambitious wedding business owner that wants to take your passion and use it to build a profitable, sustainable business doing what you you love, then you’re in the right place. Let’s get going with today’s episode. Today I’m chatting with Rebecca Cole, a wedding singer based in Northamptonshire but traveling the UK to work.
Rebecca has been in my Members Lounge program for a number of years and is always working hard to refine and grow her wedding business. I love to bring you real stories from wedding pros I work with, so I cannot wait to find out more about Rebecca. Welcome to the podcast.
Rebecca Cole
00:00:55.476 – 00:00:56.276
Thank you very much.
Becca Pountney
00:00:56.348 – 00:01:25.946
I am really looking forward to hearing more from you. I think you are one of my first ever wedding singing guests on my podcast.
I’ve had various different musicians, but I don’t think and sorry to anyone that has been a guest on here previously if I’ve got it wrong, but I don’t think we’ve had any other singers. So I’m really excited to get into this conversation. But before we get to what you do today, I always like to take the listeners back a little bit.
So take us back to the start of your career. How did you get into singing in the first place?
Rebecca Cole
00:01:26.018 – 00:02:54.484
Okay, so I started singing when I was about 8 years old. We’re not going to go that far back, but and then I trained in musical theater. I graduated in 2010. That was where my roots lie. I did various shows.
I went on a cruise ship for about 13 months. I used to live on a tour bus with lots of other performers. I’ve been on the West End.
Like I I was backing vocalist for, yeah, a show and done a range of things. And then I but in the back of my head I always had an interest in weddings.
No one around me was doing that kind of thing, but I knew that’s where I went wanted to end up. And I hadn’t seen anybody doing what I do up until that point.
Obviously have acoustic guitarists and duos and things like that, but never like a solo singer just on their own. But so I Set out the mission to start my business and I still did it alongside other shows. So I was. Think I was in the.
It’s called Thus, but it’s like one of the biggest Christmas shows in Europe. It’s mental. But I was still doing that. And on my days off, I’d be doing weddings and I’d be able to make sure that my days off coincided with that.
So I couldn’t fully, fully go cold turkey and just have weddings straight away. But so that was how I started to get into it. And. Yeah.
And then gradually I put up a video of me singing on Facebook because that’s, you know, it was a long time ago now, actually, this is my ninth year of doing weddings, so that video went kind of crazy and lots of people asking me to sing at their weddings. And, yeah, it started from there, really.
Becca Pountney
00:02:54.572 – 00:03:12.896
Now you’ve given us a very potted history there, but there’s definitely some exciting things to talk about within your story. Now, anyone who listens to this podcast regularly knows that I absolutely love musical theater.
It’s one of my favorite things and so I love talking about it. So where did you train and what were some of the highlights when you were actually working in the industry?
Rebecca Cole
00:03:13.048 – 00:04:54.642
So I trained at a place called Performers College, and, yeah, you like dancing, acting and singing. And that’s where I really wanted to be. That’s what I originally set out to be.
But then I started to get into the audition world and realize it’s actually quite grueling, it’s quite harsh. It’s a lot about what you look like, and I still probably haven’t recovered from that.
I got down to the last two for Saturday Night Fever, for quite a big American cruise line. I’m not going to say which one. And I was told when I came back the next year to try again, that I was too pale.
I’ve been told I’m too big, or this kind of thing don’t look right. But that’s. That’s the negative side of it. But the positive side is I found my way around.
I went to open auditions because, again, I wasn’t getting through the door for the musicals. I wanted to get in, but I found other jobs and it was more about your singing, your performance, and.
And it didn’t matter what your size was, luckily. So, yeah, I. One of my highlights was touring a Queen show, and we also did a Blues Brothers show. And I just.
I think it’s more also sometimes about the people that you’re working with. And, like, we were like, I Say we’re on a tour bus, we were in each other’s pockets and it was just an amazing experience.
And you went on a stage every night, loving what you’re doing. The production was amazing. You had dresses to help you, you had like a rider and sometimes you’d be open for diversity, people like that.
So that was always exciting. And like I say, the people were amazing.
I’ve done like, I’ve been in the West End, like for a night at the Thriller Theater, being a backup vocalist, but I did a big solo there.
My dad came to watch, you know, all those kind of things when you’ve worked so hard throughout your life, when you get to those moments and you look around and you’re like, it was worth it.
Becca Pountney
00:04:54.826 – 00:06:21.156
It’s a funny one though, isn’t it? Because it’s a bit like when I look back over my TV career, you like love it and you hate it at the same time. Like it’s a tough industry.
I look back on the days when I worked on the TV shows and I look back on them fondly, but I wouldn’t be able to do it still now because it was brutal and because the contracts were short and because it who you knew and not what you knew and it was hard work. And these industries, yeah, there’s work in them, but they are tough industries to get into.
It made me laugh when you’re talking about going to auditions and your size and your shape and all that kind of thing, because this is an exclusive for the podcast. But years ago, when I was sort of six form university age, I thought, I’m going to try my hand at some of these auditions.
And I remember going along to an open audition for Disneyland Paris and one of the first things they did, I don’t know if you’ve ever been to a Disney audition, is they measured you outside because for all the characters you have to be a certain height. And I remember this so well and they went, the only character you’d be able to play is Goofy because you’re so tall.
And I just remember thinking in one second, all my dizzy dreams have been crushed. Because the only person, if I ever got through, which I didn’t, that I could play because of my height was Goofy.
And the moment, as you say, the moment you walk in that door, it’s like, you know, I can talk all the time about being unapologetically you and standing out, but in that industry, no, it’s cutthroat. It’s absolutely brutal. So I can see it from both sides as well. I can see how you, you can love it. I can see how it’s tough.
So what was it then that made you go, I love this? It’s hard actually. Maybe I want to sing at weddings or do something different. Was there a specific turning point that made you think that?
Rebecca Cole
00:06:21.228 – 00:07:45.408
I think also just being in between jobs as well, like you say the contracts are short and then there’d be a period of time where you’re auditioning for the next thing, your money’s not coming in, you’re a waitress while you’re waiting for the next thing. It’s very up and down. Like I lived in London for a bit and that, you know, you can’t live off nothing in London.
You have to go on a job and then they give you money, they give you your accommodation, but you’ve never really got anywhere sturdy, nowhere to like set your roots. And I knew I wanted a family one day. I just thought, maybe I can try and stay in one place. I might have to travel around the country.
I worked for other companies. I did like girl groups. I used to be in a little mixed tribute, a Spice Girl tribute, that kind of thing, and working for other people.
And then I kind of got the gigging side of it, which is the technical side of it, which you don’t learn at college. Like all the equipment you have to use, getting your work, basically finding it yourself, making those connections.
And then I thought maybe I could try it on my own. And like I say, I wanted a family, so I wanted to try and make it work around me. And if you’re self employed, you can do that.
You can say, I’m not available for that day. A little bit different when you’re working for someone else because they. You give them your diary and you haven’t really got much of a say.
But I didn’t like that aspect.
I really wanted to work specifically for myself and go to family events that and that I’ve been missing for years and years and years and now I can do that and it’s all on my terms, which is the dream really, isn’t it?
Becca Pountney
00:07:45.544 – 00:08:01.376
Yeah, absolutely. So do you remember your first wedding booking? Do you remember how it came about? Was it a friend and family member? Was it a random stranger?
Because I always think it’s interesting for people starting out to look back and go, oh, how did they get their first booking? Because it’s often the hardest one to get.
Rebecca Cole
00:08:01.528 – 00:09:44.086
Yeah, I think it came from that first Facebook video. I think they contacted me through that. I didn’t know that and it was at a church with two church.
Weddings, when I started were much more of a thing than they are now. And I don’t know if you have. They don’t open them, the doors very early for you. You kind of like.
I got there really early, ready to go, but I had to wait until the vicar was there or whoever the person is that has the keys, and then I have to get in. And it was all like a learning curve, that kind of thing. But, yeah, it was a stranger, somebody I didn’t know, and she was really grateful.
But I was so nervous, as you can imagine, it’s like the biggest pressure because it’s somebody’s really special day and I was doing the ceremony, just the ceremony that day. But it went really well and. But then they went.
They left and I didn’t see them and I didn’t know if I’d done a good job or not until they emailed me afterwards and told me no, that was amazing. And then you start to get confidence. And then another friend of a friend of mine was getting married and I said, I’ll do a drink reception for free.
I’m still learning. Like, I needed to get, you know, drink reception is two hours. Like, I’d never had to sing that long all on my own.
And ballads, love songs, though, it was all a learning curve for me. And like, with my equipment, getting there early, that kind of thing. So that was at Barton Hors, anyone knows Buttonhole.
And I’ve done lots of weddings since then there. And yeah, again, it’s just if you know people that get married, that’s a great way to start because you can give your services for free.
Only at the very beginning, though, because you have to make money. Yeah. And it kind of snowballed from there. I think word of mouth is my big thing. Recommendations, like, I’m a bit old school that way.
That seems to be how I get my bookings. And I was of the age nine years ago, where a lot of people I knew were getting married and that kind of like snowballed. Yeah, yeah.
Becca Pountney
00:09:44.118 – 00:10:49.808
And then suddenly you age out of that, don’t you? Because I remember there was about a decade where I went to weddings every single summer. And then suddenly you’re like, oh, now all my.
All my friends are having children. Now they know. Maybe I can sing at christenings instead.
But it’s interesting because you say the old school in your word of mouth, but actually your first bookings did come from social media because that was what kind of got you known in the first place. So it is a bit of a, bit of both, isn’t it? You’ve got to get yourself out there. But yeah, the referral is absolutely important.
Now I do have a question for you, but this is a very specific question because I went out for dinner on Friday night to a Thai restaurant with my friend and there was a singer in Bedford singing while we were eating dinner. And she was wonderful, really good.
She had a pop up banner and she was singing and we got talking over dinner because the person I went with is also like singing like me. We were saying it must be really hard to be the singer when you’re just singing in the background and everyone’s talking over the top of you.
And is that something that’s enjoyable or is that something that’s really difficult?
So as I’ve got you here, I’m going to ask you, when you’re singing at drinks, receptions and everyone’s just doing their own thing and you’re just in the background, do you enjoy that or is it a weird experience because it’s very different to standing on a stage where everyone’s captivated and silent and then clapping you at the end?
Rebecca Cole
00:10:49.864 – 00:11:40.460
Yeah, I absolutely love it. Like, I love people watching. And that is basically what you’re doing. You’re looking at everybody on a really happy day.
Hopefully everybody’s getting on, people look at you and they kind of give you a nod. As in, like, I know that song, like I really appreciate that. Or they sing along and they, they’re not fully engaged.
But that takes the pressure off you. You can just enjoy singing for what it is without all this extra. They’re looking at me. What do I look like? Was it, what am I wearing?
Wherever you’re adding an atmosphere to the most important day of somebody’s lives and I can bring joy through that and that gives me joy. So I don’t care if people are talking over me. It would be weird if everybody was looking.
I, I like people drinking their drinks and having a canopy and like I say if they know a song and they say they give you the eye, like, oh, good choice. I’m like, yes.
Becca Pountney
00:11:41.680 – 00:12:16.404
And I actually, I can imagine that it is quite nice to sing like that without that pressure of feeling. Like if I get one wrong note, everyone’s gonna look at me.
Or if, if I make a weird gesture with my hand or something like that, it definitely takes the pressure off and, well, what better place to be singing than at someone’s wedding? Maybe, maybe that’s going to be my Retirement plan. Maybe I’ll go into wedding singing as well, because I would enjoy.
I’ll come out, gonna do some duets. Now, when you look back over your time in the industry, you’ve been in the industry a long time now.
Do you see some of the mistakes you made early on? Do you look back at anything and go, I don’t know why I did this, or do you feel like you’ve got it right all the way through?
Rebecca Cole
00:12:16.492 – 00:12:59.280
I think at the beginning, I tried to remember every single song that I learned. So imagine I’m learning at least six songs sometimes a wedding. And if you’re doing a lot of weddings a year, that’s just too much.
So luckily, there’s a thing called an iPad, and you can have it subtly to the side of you and look, glance over if you need a word or something like that, because everybody does that. Even Rod Stewart does that.
Like, everybody, like big, has a prompt, because you cannot learn that amount of songs and make it special for that couple. And, yeah, so I probably would have known about that a bit sooner and not put so much pressure on myself. But, yeah, that’s about it. I think.
I think I’ve done everything perfectly apart from that.
Becca Pountney
00:12:59.820 – 00:13:32.368
Oh, well, that’s. That’s always a good place to be in. And I think it’s interesting because you do, like you said, there’s no template at the beginning.
And actually, even if you’re in a part of the industry where there’s a lot of other people doing it, when you start out, you’re doing it your way and in your style and in your area, and it is hard, and you do have to find your way through.
And there are ways that you can, you know, read books, you can go and listen to podcasts like this one, and you can try and learn from other people’s mistakes, but ultimately, you do have to find your own journey through. I’d like to know as well, are there ever any songs that you say no to or will you sing anything that anyone asks you?
Rebecca Cole
00:13:32.424 – 00:14:54.970
I think in the beginning, nine years ago, I think a lot. A lot of people didn’t really know where to start with what wedding songs they wanted. So somebody did ask me for my way, Frank Sinatra.
And I was like, I just think you should have a little rethink about this. And they’re like, but they say, we had it at my grandma’s funeral.
And I was like, yes, but if you just go back, listen to the words it says, and now the end is near. This is not the end. This is the beginning of your marriage and your life together. So I have to just.
I had to just subtly be like, let’s have another little thing. Give some suggestions. You want the lyrics of the main thing when it comes to song.
Yes, the melody might be nice, but you don’t want Adele playing at your wedding, really, because a lot of it’s a breakup song. So I won’t not do it. I just suggest maybe we should do this. And nowadays there’s so much on.
There’s so many people doing covers of love songs and it’s. It’s more readily available and of the time people pick lovely songs.
A lot of the time people pick Can’t Help Falling in Love, the Haley Reinhart version by Elvis Presley. You know that similar, similar sort of songs, because they are so good and they’re. The words do lend themselves so well to a wedding.
But yeah, I won’t not do anything. I think so. I think I haven’t said. But I also have a band in the evening and you know, we’ve played all sorts of things. So yeah, anything goes really.
But you have to really think about the setting and the atmosphere.
Becca Pountney
00:14:55.900 – 00:15:49.228
Yeah. And absolutely advising them on the right thing.
I’ve probably shared this on the podcast before, but once I went to a wedding and they had this great idea where the guests were going to be the dj and so they had this machine where you could go and add songs to it and then they played over the speaker.
But within about 10 minutes of this machine going live, what do guests do, especially when they’re drunk at wedding, start putting on all the breakup songs or the inappropriate songs. And like within 10 minutes it was like, this was not the idea that you thought it was going to. Going to be.
So, yeah, I think when we have experience in weddings and the things we can have these great ideas that this is a great song to have. But actually the reality can be very, very different. When you look now, obviously things have changed. Facebook isn’t such a big deal anymore.
You know, now it’s all about Instagram. It’s about tick tock. When you look at your inquiries now for both your wedding singing business and your band.
Where do you think most of them come from? If you were to look at what you’ve got. But for 2025, I think still they.
Rebecca Cole
00:15:49.284 – 00:16:57.580
Come mainly from being recommended at venues, luckily for me. Or word of mouth. Or Instagram. Yeah. Being a recommended supplier at Dodvan Manor. So that’s like my main wedding venue.
And I got on their recommended supplies, really luckily, like about Nine years ago. And then my band did as well. We came and auditioned sort of thing. They recommend us because they know that we do a good job.
They know that I do a good job. They like me as well. I think being likable is a big thing in this industry that nobody wants to work with somebody that’s a diva.
Nobody wants to work with somebody that’s not going to help you in the running of the day, like being flexible, that kind of thing. So yeah, being recommended by certain venues, that’s really helped me.
And then maybe somebody sees me at that wedding and then they tell their friend about it and then their friend tells me. And there was at one point, one summer, I think it’s after Covid and I had about four weddings in a row.
I kept seeing the same guest as a hi again because not all of the same guests, but just like one. Yeah. So that’s mainly recommended supplier at venues, sometimes Instagram.
So they find me maybe a video I’ve posted of me singing and things like that.
Becca Pountney
00:16:57.880 – 00:17:21.786
Yeah, mainly there’ll be people listening and thinking I want to be like that. I want to be able to say I’m recommended at loads of venues. Because that is a sticking point for people. People have that as the kind of goal.
But it’s not always as easy as just being recommended. Do you remember back how you have gone about getting recommended by those venues? Is it where you’ve performed there and then they’ve liked you?
Have you approached them, tell us about how that’s happened for you?
Rebecca Cole
00:17:21.858 – 00:18:56.520
I think, do you know what? It’s changed a lot recently as well. Because I can see people being recommended at venues that haven’t even done weddings there.
So they might do an open day for them and then they ask if they can be a wedding recommended, which I would never have done years ago. You just wouldn’t have asked that. You wait to be asked.
So I think it is changing and maybe you do need to ask now because there’d be venues I’ve worked at a lot and I’m like, oh, I’m not recommended. And then I asked them, they’re like, oh, you are. And I’m like, okay. So sometimes nowadays it is worth an ass. Back then it wasn’t so for in question.
I had to go and audition if you like and see if they like me. And also if we fit in their sound regulations. And then other venues.
Yeah, just doing open days for people because although it is good for you, for your business, it’s also helping them. It makes their Venue, have an atmosphere or if you’re like a venue dresser, like, makes their venue look lovely. Open evenings.
I also, I’m going to sing an open evening on Friday night at Horp and I’ve got a taster day on at Dodford on Sunday. So you do have to do a lot of work that is perhaps unpaid, but you’re helping the venue, you’re helping yourself, you’re making those connections.
You’re also in a more relaxed environment than on a wedding day when everything is very high pressured and your personality can come out, theirs can come out. And yeah, that, that’s, that’s generally how I just. Being a nice person, that’s gonna sound so lame. But I, I do think that goes a long way.
You, you want to work like there’s photographers I’ve worked with, I’ve worked with the best photographers I’ve worked with, you know, a range of photographers. But the ones you remember, the ones you get on with sometimes.
Becca Pountney
00:18:57.340 – 00:20:59.632
Yeah, absolutely. And it is not lame at all because I talk about it on the podcast all the time about being a good person.
Because you are surprised how many people you come across who are not like the.
And you know, I, I live in this happy world where I’m like, well, everyone’s a nice person and everyone’s a good supplier and everyone’s ethical and everyone does things the right way. And we quickly realize that that’s not true. And so when we are the people doing that, you are a shining light and you are more likely to stand out.
And I think it’s interesting because you say about doing things for free and you will know that I’m a big advocate of not undervaluing yourself and not charging too little and not discounting and all that kind of thing.
But I do think there’s a big difference because it’s not that you’re doing it for free, it’s a exchange of services because that by doing that event, it will likely lead to decent amounts of money in the future. So I think it is important that we don’t have a black and white or I’m never doing anything for free.
Becca says to value herself because actually, yeah, you shouldn’t go out and do a wedding for free every week.
But if there is a genuine exchange of services and you’re not being taken advantage of and you know, I’m going to go and sing at this event, or you came and sang at my event, which I loved because you really added to the atmosphere.
And then you think, well, well I know that off the back of that I’ll get PR or I’ll meet new people or the venue will recommend me, then actually it’s definitely worth doing. So I think that’s just a message to anyone listening that it’s not very black and white. It’s not never do anything for free.
But when you are asked to do things for free, you’ve got to weigh it up and work out if it’s the right thing to do or not. And in this case I think it absolutely is.
And I’ve shared the story before of Dom the saxophone player who went round to all the open days when he first started and offered to play saxophone at the open days and he got on so many recommended supplier lists just because he offered to go and do it for free. And so it was definitely worth his time.
Now, you mentioned earlier about how when you came out of the industry and set up your own business, one of the things you wanted to be able to do was settle down and have a family. And that is now part of your life. You do have children. So talk to me about that.
How has that adjusted how you do business and how have you managed to juggle it? Because it’s not always easy.
Rebecca Cole
00:20:59.696 – 00:23:28.100
It is not. Grandparents are the salt of the earth. They are, they are the best. Because, you know, weddings aren’t nine to five, you have.
And so grandparents and my husband, I should say, if it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t be able to do what I’m doing.
Like literally now they are at their grandparents because I have my 18 month old full time, I have my 4 and a half year old most of the time she’s at nursery three mornings a week and I work every night until about 11, 12 at night, every night. Doing some kind of admin, recording contracts, maybe a bit of social media. So that is my juggle. That is my it. That is what it is.
And it’s not going to be forever. They’re only young for a period of time and I don’t want to miss out on anything. I’m sure it’ll be easier when she goes to school in September.
Like what I. And I didn’t really have a stuff. I think you may have seen me very pregnant singing at weddings.
I had to stop at a certain point because I didn’t want to panic the brides, you know, I didn’t want to get too close to it. It’s that selfish. You don’t want your, your singer giving. I think there was one that I did at like eight months and then they.
The wedding coordinate went up to the. Brian was like, Rebecca. And they’re like, oh, my God, is she here? Like, So I didn’t. I didn’t want that any further than that.
And they were so grateful I was there and I didn’t want the pressure of it, so I did that. And then I think maybe it was maybe six weeks or, gosh, maybe eight weeks old. My youngest was.
And I was at the Milton Keynes wedding show during three days, but my dad was with the pram walking around when I wasn’t singing on. When I was singing on stage. And then when I wasn’t, he came and brought the baby to me and I was feeding and then I had someone else help me.
I paid for them to, like, run the stand when I wasn’t there. So I can’t not be there because it’s not a business where you’re employing. It’s not like, I don’t know, miniature golf, like, where you.
It doesn’t matter if you’re there or not. I have to be there. I am selling myself on my voice and my personality and if you get on with me or not.
So, yeah, I couldn’t really take a break and I think there’s a lot of. Of women in the wedding industry that are the same. You, you just have to keep going.
You have to keep getting those bookings because they’re booked so far in advance. You don’t want your face to be out of the game. But you know that I didn’t take on too many and, and it’s not every day. It’s. It’s few and far between.
I only take on a certain amount of winners each year, quite a lot, but they’re spread out and, you know, I’m still mum first and wedding singer, maybe just underneath.
Becca Pountney
00:23:28.590 – 00:25:03.840
And it is tough. And the thing is, you, you do get the best of both worlds in some ways and the worst of both worlds in some ways.
Because isn’t it a joy to be at home and to be with them all the day? Not all the time. It doesn’t always feel like a joy, but a lot of the time it is a privilege to be there.
And actually it’s great that we can have businesses that we can go out and do in the evenings or go out and do things and we can stay up late and it is only for a period. I remember back now, I mean, I sound like an old lady when I start talking back, but I remember holding a networking event when I was pregnant.
I was about eight months pregnant with my daughter who is now eight, shows how long I’ve been doing this. And I did it then. And then I remember going out and running another networking event six to eight weeks after she was born.
And I look back now and I was like, I was crazy. But I also look back and think, but I couldn’t have done it any other way.
I don’t have any regrets about doing that because actually that’s allowed me to do what I do now. Now they are both at school and people say to me all the time, oh, you’re so lucky to have. Have a work that fits around your kids.
And I always say I’m not lucky.
I worked blooming hard for this and there was times when I did exactly what you did, which was I was with the kids all day with barely any childcare and then I would work all evening and all my events for in the evening. And actually it does get easier, I promise, once they go to school.
And also I just think it’s so good to be a role model for your kids, for them to see. I think it’s important for them to know I have my own business, I go out and do work. This is so that we can go on nice holidays.
This is so that we can do that. But I’m also doing it so that I can be there in the day. But the mum guilt does get you. Do you get mum guilt all the.
Rebecca Cole
00:25:03.880 – 00:26:19.510
Time when they’re crying when you leave, but more when they were little, I think when they were really little. But now they love going to grandma’s house. They, they do fun things, they get to spend more time one on one with their dad. Like that I get so.
It is, it is, yeah. But like you say, I. My little girl was like, when I grow up I want to be a mum and I want to be a singer.
So she knows that you can do both, which, you know, it’s times before couldn’t. You had to do one or the other, you had to choose.
And like you say, you put in the groundwork so that it does eventually work out for you in the long run, although it doesn’t seem like it will. I think, yeah, I went into. It was after Covid, I was doing a wedding and I didn’t want to let the couple down.
But again, my baby was six weeks old and I had to like because no one else was allowed in the building. I had to go to the car and feed her.
And so there are dark times, those kind of things I do, I do regret and I did get back home And I cried my eyes out. But that was probably hormones as well.
But also I’m bringing in money, you know, statutory maternity pay is nothing and I had to just keep going and make sure, you know, everything’s paid for. And like, like you say, I don’t have to work 9 to 5 every day, so I’m very lucky for that.
And I, I get to see them grow up and yeah, I’m, I’m happy with how I’ve done things.
Becca Pountney
00:26:19.550 – 00:27:33.776
I think, yeah, you absolutely should be. And I think anyone again, anyone listening to this, who is in that situation, whether you’re right at the start, it is tough.
But talk to other people about it because there’s people are more than happy to chat who’ve gone through it first and to talk about how they did it. And there will be dark times and it will be difficult at times and there’s some people that take a break and there’s some people that don’t.
There’s no right or wrong but it does get better, I promise you.
I feel like I’m like coming out the other side now with an 8 year old and an 11 year old and it gets better but they don’t always still appreciate what you do because again, I might have shared this on the podcast before I got asked to go on the school trip recently because my 11 year old son said to his teacher, my mum can come because she does nothing during the day even though I work.
So from her, his perspective, which is great, again I’m like, well that’s a nice perspective because he thinks I’m there waiting to pick him up from school. But the reality is I do work hard, son, I promise, I promise I do.
Now Rebecca, you’ve also been in my members lounge as I mentioned right at the start of this episode, for a number of years now and I’ve loved watching your journey, journey, seeing you have your kids, all of that stuff, I love having you around. Do you remember back to joining the members lounge? Why did you join in the first place? Or what do you get out of being part of the community?
Rebecca Cole
00:27:33.928 – 00:29:52.752
I think I was again recommended by someone, I think it was a celebrant friend and they’re like have you heard about Becca? And I was like no. And then I think I started following you and then I got painted this members lounge where I was a bit like, oh, what’s going on?
All this information is at my fingertips.
So yeah, there’s, there’s so many and I think I quote you not on a daily basis but Maybe a weekly basis of like oh well she says to do this, Becca says to do this and there’s always something and it’s constantly changing and that’s the thing. If I didn’t have this I think I would have been like what’s going on? Like I feel like it’s like a seat.
It is a secret members couple almost, isn’t it?
It’s like you’ve got the secret and to try and work out together sometimes with the other suppliers like oh my goodness, this is happening on social media. Like let’s navigate our way through it and, and also commenting and what they struggle with and everybody helping to come to.
I mean I’d love to have a one to one with you eventually maybe when the kids go to school and then I can really, really buckle down.
I think that’s where, when I’ll really start to try even, even harder because there’s always something to be doing, there’s always something to improve on and I think you’re good at making people believe in themselves as well and like having like I, I’m still needing to be a bit better at this. But you need to show what you do. Like I never did that in the beginning.
Unless you show somebody what you’re doing then they don’t know and you kind of have to shout it from the rooftops and spell it out for people. So that kind of thing.
And helping with wedding fairs like how to get, you know, not get people in but like you know how to talk to people, how to have a strategy. Because I would in the beginning just rock up and be like words. They don’t want to talk to me, that’s fine.
And I know now that actually I have someone else with me to sell me because I can’t sell myself as well as somebody else will.
So all these things there’s, there’s so there’s too many things probably to say but it’s always very helpful and I probably need to, when they go to school I will like be like your A class student or whatever but because there’s always something to do and there’s always something to improve on.
Website everything and even we’ve had people guest speakers in and people to look at like I think someone actually looked at my website and gave feedback on a zoom course like things like that. Really helpful.
Becca Pountney
00:29:52.816 – 00:32:06.246
Yeah. So invaluable. And it’s interesting because I think when they go to school’s the perfect time.
I always said to people I’m going to grow my business with my children and that’s exactly what I’ve done. Because there, there is a limited capacity when they’re young, because you only have so many hours in the day. And that capacity gets bigger again.
People say to me, oh, it’s nice for you swanning off to Las Vegas. I’m like, well, it is, is. But I wouldn’t have been able to do that when they were under five. Absolutely not.
But it’s only when they’ve been six, seven, eight, nine, you know, that that’s been possible. And so I think it’s a great goal to have grow your business with your children because then as they get older, you can do bigger and bigger things.
And you’re right, there’s always more to learn. That’s what I love about the members. That’s why I set it up right in this.
In the start really was because what used to happen is I would run a social media training in a hotel and. And 15 people would come, and then a week later, Facebook would change the algorithm. Cause it was the days when Facebook was the big thing.
And then I’m like, well, how do I tell them all that we’ve got to do it again? Because it’s now changed.
And so what I love about the members lounge is whether you dip in and out every now and again or whether you’re in there all the time, doesn’t matter.
But if something changes, I try and make sure you know about it or I bring in the right person to tell you, because otherwise everything’s out of date the minute after it’s done.
It’s funny, when I wrote my book recently is I’ve been really careful what I write in there because I know if I start talking about TikTok, for example, tomorrow TikTok could get banned. And then the book’s out of date. It’s imprint. And so we know things are always changing. And it’s important to find ways to stay ahead of the game.
And if you are listening to this and you feel like you need that, then this podcast is a great place to start. But do invest further. Come into the members lounge. It is the secret club.
Because one of the things I get out of it that I love is when people in there, not me, other people, share what they’re going through or share what they’ve learned or share their vulnerabilities. And the way that the community supports and jumps on it and helps them is always really refreshing. And I think sometimes business is lonely. We need.
We need other people now on that. How do you find NAVIGATING this world of other wedding singers because you know me, I’m always talking about community over competition.
You’ve mentioned it before. More and more people are coming into the wedding industry. How are you staying in your own lane and not getting.
Getting sidetracked too much by what else is going on?
Rebecca Cole
00:32:06.398 – 00:35:07.584
So, yeah, there are a lot of wedding singers now around and there are people that are putting a lot of numbers up. I’ve got this many weddings, I’ve done this, and it’s really easy to get bogged down. And I’ve spoken to wedding singers that I’m friends of online.
Maybe I’ve met them in person, maybe I haven’t. And we share our. We go, well, actually I’m. I’ve got this many. And actually, well, people have said I’ve only put that up for like a marketing thing.
And you’re like, oh, it is very draining to see it. But once, you know, like behind closed doors, actually not as all it seems. And you have to keep reminding yourself of that.
And people may be doing well and people may be doing better than you. But I know that for me, I don’t actually have to travel very far. I don’t really travel over an hour.
And that is working inside with what my life is, my lifestyle, my children, childcare. So I’m actually quite happy. Like, when you do see the numbers, you’re like, oh, I should be doing that.
But you just really have to keep reminding yourself you’re doing okay. And if you hadn’t seen that, you would never have thought that. And it is like community over. Like, so I have.
When I was pregnant, I had to get some people in to cover the very last ones that I was doing. Hopefully people would ask me if they were in the same position. Hopefully for them in the future. So there is an element of that. And.
And also it’s nice to see because we have a green circle as well where you share, like, maybe things that you’re struggling with. And it’s. It’s nice to see that people are like, oh, this is really hard. Because for years is.
Again, it looks to the outside people like, oh, she just wanders up to a wedding and sings a few songs. There’s so much more that goes behind the scenes. And to have other people go, yeah, no, it’s really hard. I’m like, okay, good. Okay.
Because I thought I was just so. There is that. But you have to stay on top of it.
Like, again, I think I only started, I did the odd video, but I really have to make More effort to do it.
People were doing a lot of content at weddings and I just was always focused on the wedding, which you should be because it’s someone’s important day. But maybe I have to get there a bit earlier then.
And I’m always there ridiculously early anyway to make some content, to make sure that people know you are doing a wedding the same as everybody else. And so that’s what I, I’m trying to keep up with because everybody else is doing that. So.
And, and also if you don’t do a wedding fair, someone else is definitely going to be there. Whereas years ago no one would be replacing me. There’s a hundred people lining up to take my place, so I cannot rest on my laurels.
I think, think a lot of wedding suppliers thought that at one stage, like, oh yeah, you know, this is fine. And I think after covert, because you had the double amount of weddings that you would have had done, you’d be like, this is great.
No, everything’s changing all the time. You cannot just assume that you’re going to have lots of weddings that next year.
So especially with the competition, I, I do, I do feel a bit like heavy hearted sometimes. I’m like, come on, just keep going, keep going. But I don’t want to not do this job.
So if I have to keep trying and try even harder to be as good, if not better, then I will keep trying.
Becca Pountney
00:35:07.672 – 00:36:41.328
And you are amazing. And I love it when you share videos of you singing and you don’t necessarily even need to share videos of you singing at a wedding.
You can just share videos of songs that people like to hear on your Instagram.
And I think, you know, everything in our business is really important that we don’t do things because other people are doing them, but we do things in a way that suits us and our lifestyle. And so if for you focusing on the wedding is more important, that’s a selling point, right?
That’s a selling point to be like, I’m not here to capture content at your wedding, I’m here to sing at your wedding.
And I would talk about that on social media because actually do I want a wedding singer that’s followed round by someone creating content all the time, or do I want a wedding singer who’s there singing at my wedding? And so actually a little bit of live coaching here. Actually I would use that as a marketing point. I would say, like, take a photo of the venue.
I’m here at X venue today at this wedding. You won’t see any footage because it’s really important to me that all of my attention’s on the couple.
And use it in your marketing and save yourself time. You know how I do that? When people talk to me about my podcast and they say, you should video your podcast. You should put it on YouTube.
All of the podcasters have it on YouTube and TikTok. And I say I don’t want to because sometimes I want to do it in my pajamas with no makeup on. And I don’t want the pressure of that.
And so, you know, the whole point of having our own business is that we can do our own business our own way. So I think if it feels heavy, heavy, don’t even try and film at weddings. Take that burden off.
You use that as a marketing point going forward and record yourself singing in your house when your kids are napping and you’ve got a bit of free time and you can, like, put out requests and we can all put in our songs that we want to hear you say.
Rebecca Cole
00:36:41.384 – 00:36:46.752
There you go. Thank you for the coaching life on the podcast anytime.
Becca Pountney
00:36:46.816 – 00:37:38.330
But honestly, I just think it’s so hard, isn’t it? We look at what other people are doing. I do it too. I look at people, I think, oh, that person’s speaking at this event.
Or this person’s got 50 million, 000 followers. And then I think, well, I don’t actually want to be at that event right now because I’m enjoying being at home with my kids.
Or actually, they probably just bought 10,000 followers. So I know that mine are genuine, so I don’t actually care. But it’s so easy to fall into that trap.
And I think every single one of us, and I’m sure a lot of people listening, do the same thing as well. Right, Rebecca, We’ve got to draw this to a close. Otherwise I could talk to you all day. I’ve really enjoyed the conversation. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for being so open and honest about the ups and downs of your business, how you juggle things in your life as well. It’s been a real pleasure chatting with you. I always end the podcast with the same question, so I’m going to pose that to you now.
It’s what’s one thing you wish you’d known sooner in your own business?
Rebecca Cole
00:37:38.450 – 00:38:10.360
I think to have a crystal ball, which you can’t do, and just know that it will be okay and you’ll be successful and there’ll be ups and downs, but keep going. Also, maybe joining TikTok earlier because, my goodness, I just thought it was Something that people did dances on and it is not.
It’s a real good tool, which I, yeah, wish I’d started earlier. But everything else I do feel is an organic way of my. Of me growing my business.
I don’t think there’s much else I could have changed, to be honest, as arrogant as that might sound.
Becca Pountney
00:38:10.780 – 00:39:03.564
No, it doesn’t sound arrogant at all because it’s your journey. I wouldn’t change anything I’ve done either when I look back. But I do think all of us would like a crystal ball for sure.
And I think I love that trend where people go back and talk to their, you know, talk to themselves when they were 12, whatever, on Instagram at the moment. And I think, yeah, actually, I wish I, I could go back and tell Becca, who had a baby and a toddler, it’s going to be okay.
One day you’re going to get to go to Las Vegas and you’re not always going to be crying in your front room because the kids are driving you crazy and you’re exhausted. Actually, one day it’s going to get better and your business will grow and you’ll look back and you’ll be really proud.
And so even now you can look forward and know that in a decade’s time, you’ll be looking at the Rebecca on this podcast today, listening back to this and knowing, actually, I’m really proud that I got through that and look at what I’ve achieved now. Rekka, it’s been so much fun chatting to you.
If people want find out more about you, find out more or even watch some of you singing, where’s the best places for them to find you?
Rebecca Cole
00:39:03.652 – 00:39:11.580
So Instagram’s regularly updated, so Rebecca Cole or I am on Facebook. Yeah, mainly Instagram. And yeah, just stop on by, say.
Becca Pountney
00:39:11.620 – 00:39:17.164
Hi, give me a follow, please, and Tick Tock. Presumably now that you know you’re on.
Rebecca Cole
00:39:17.172 – 00:39:25.640
Tick Tick Tock, but not many followers. So, yeah, you know, help a girl out and give me a follow on Tick Tock. Get this grandma up to date with what’s going on.
Becca Pountney
00:39:26.180 – 00:40:11.602
Seriously. And I went to the school careers fair last week and I was showing them all Instagram.
So many of them asked me, I was like, look how many followers I’ve got. Instagram, 4,000. And they were like, how many on TikTok? I was like, let’s not talk about that because I’m old and you’re not. But it did.
Again, looking at these kids coming through the careers fair in year eight and how much they’re on TikTok I’m like, this is coming like a steam train and we need to jump on it and we need to stop being grandmas, even though we feel like we’re too old for TikTok. Rebecca, it’s been so much fun. I’ll make sure I put all of your links in the show notes.
If you’re listening to this and you’ve enjoyed our conversation, do reach out to Rebecca. Rebecca, say hello.
And if you want to get to know her further or you want to get to know me better and you want to get your business on track, why not consider joining the members lounge? We’d love to welcome you, Rebecca. I will see you soon, hopefully. Take care.
Rebecca Cole
00:40:11.706 – 00:40:12.770
Thanks so much for having me.
Becca Pountney
00:40:12.810 – 00:40:35.570
Bye. What a fantastic conversation.
I always really enjoy chatting with my members because I get to find out more about their businesses, find out more about their backgrounds and see what’s going on and what they’ve learned over their time. And I really enjoyed that conversation.
Hopefully you took something away from it that, you know, we can just work things out as we go along, but a little bit of help along the way can help fast track that too. I’ll see you next time.
0 Comments